The Power from the Seat of Frustration

“All the good that we’ve done can be wiped away by one angry word.”

Interacting with others, especially those we touch and that touch us personally in our daily lives, offers countless opportunities for frustration. Within these frustrated moments, we often respond with anger, criticism and discouragement. That anger, criticism and discouragement then gets transmitted to others and eventually back to ourselves. Finding the presence of mind to shut down that nearly automatic response system is extremely difficult but is absolutely possible.

We all affect people, through our words, through our actions, through our intentions. Having a more thorough understanding and appreciation of how these words, actions and intentions affect others is crucial. All that we say, do and think comes back to us eventually. Therefore, any attempts to affect our reactivity from the seat of frustration can have a dramatic, immediate impact on daily life.

Frustration is natural.

Frustration is created by our attachment to having it our way in a world that involves others wanting it their way. This creates a dynamic cycle that recirculates and intensifies frustration and our reaction to frustration continuously. If we alter our reaction from the seat of frustration, we can begin to shut down this cycle within us and others.

Frustration can be explored.

The best way to alter our reaction to our frustration is through thorough exploration of it. It is not imperative for us to act immediately to simple frustration. Instead, we can take a moment to be curious about how it was generated. If we focus our mind on it, we can more clearly see our role in our frustration and clarify the role of others as well. This clear seeing and clarification will aid in finding words of encouragement as opposed to discouragement.

Frustration is our own.

The way we think and feel is our own. Just because someone is doing something or we perceive is doing something to us, does not mean this someone is injecting this feeling of frustration into us. This does not mean that others have no role in shining a light on our frustration, but it does mean that it is our frustration to manage. Potentially, we can redirect this frustration in a more beneficial way as opposed to only detrimental.

Make that which you touch be the best in others.

How often has someone said an unkind or critical word to us that inspired us to be and do better? Remember that truth when interacting with the objects of our frustration. We need to inspire the best in others, not shut the best down. Inspiring the best in others involves having patience, generating compassion and finding understanding.

Make that which you touch in others be the common humanity we share.

We all are part of humanity. We all play a role in the lives of others. We all experience pain and suffering. We all can experience joy and happiness. No one arrived at today all on their own. So many people have affected us and will affect us moving forward. We will affect others today. If we consider how best to affect others, we will bring out the best in them and in our self.

Make our response not add to the pain and suffering of us all.

It is rare that people deliberately, maliciously upset others. If there is intention to upset, this person is hurt and damaged and needs compassion and understanding, not more pain, not more suffering. It is not easy when we feel hurt to not retaliate immediately. If we do, it is understandable.

It should be understandable that others will retaliate similarly. If one of your limbs becomes injured, you don’t chastise or punish the limb, you give it proper care and attention. The same should be given to the injured amongst us.

Frustration is truly fertile territory. People that expose our frustration have blessed us. It is from the seat of frustration that we either inspire others or we tear others down. It is from the seat of frustration that we can bring out the best in our self and in others.
Who is going to be the first person to do the better thing today?

The Blessings of Difficulties and Disappointments

Always look forward to the solutions, not to the problems those solutions intend to solve.

When we strive to achieve anything, difficulties and disappointments should be expected. If we do not believe difficulties and disappointments will arise on our path, we will be shocked and dismayed when they do. Also, if we simply believe something is happening to us or being done to us, we become a victim of our conditions. Laying down the mantle of the victim is the first step in getting back to achieving something with this life when conditions don’t follow the course of our design.

These difficulties and disappointments are designed to happen. We set in motion the events and situations that we experience. Certainly, others can create problems for us. Others can always do this, and it should always be expected. If we do not design our actions with others in mind, we are living in a bubble of our own creation that can be popped by our simple ignorance of others. If what we want in our life is all about our own self-interest, we still cannot live in a bubble indefinitely. If what we want is about others, we certainly cannot ignore others, we must account for them in our plans.

Inflexibility is why difficulties and disappointments can be so debilitating. Inflexibility, the inability to adapt on the spot, is in the way of discovering the purpose in each difficulty and in each disappointment. Discovering the purposefulness in these moments is crucial in continuing forward, to achieving anything, especially something greater than just our own self-interests.

Regardless of the difficulty or the disappointment, we, individually, have the superior role, and we are the superior source of that turmoil. This role and responsibility we hold may not be easy or comfortable to embrace initially. However, we can certainly agree the ultimate bearer of the difficulties and disappointments we experience is our own self. If we’re going to return to work, return to the role of achiever, we must at least embrace the role of the bearer as well.

It is important to realize the goals behind embracing this role. It is not about simple pain and suffering because we deserve it, because we do not. We are learning how to take care of our own self and our own path. Thorough exploration of the source of our life experiences, which is our own self, must start there as well.

Perhaps, our observations were mistaken or not complete.
Perhaps, our actions were not precise or thought through.
Perhaps, our feelings were ignored or were overwhelming.
Perhaps, our intentions were not clear or were not realistic.

This is where to begin that exploration. Be curious about life. This is how we learn, how we adapt and how we achieve better.

We must expect difficulty.
We must expect disappointment.
We must expand our awareness.
We must adapt and continue to strive to achieve.

It is possible to go further than just a simple expectation that conditions will not always follow our design. When we use our explorative mind in all moments, difficulties and disappointments can become fuel for our efforts. These are not negative aspects of living and doing. These are productive aspects of learning and adapting. These are blessings; we need only expand our awareness to see them as such.

Expanding Awareness, From the Source of Hope and Dream

Hopes and dreams can be so exciting and inspire us to action, to reaching beyond today by letting go of yesterday. Our actions from the source of hope and dream have an appearance of purity and light. Then, we wake up, and we realize that purity and light do not simply live in a vacuum.

The light of the sun dawns and shines on half the planet while the other half remains darkened. The darkness is real, but the light is also real. Both co-exist and are also inseparable. To purify water, the impurities are extracted, but not disappeared. The other-than-pure can never be eradicated from the universe. Other-than-pure is made of the same stuff as the pure. There can be no separating the two regardless of how obvious or apparent the separation might be.

We must move our awareness beyond the whimsical and the simply feel-so-good. Expanding our awareness to include the total of our existence and the total of all existence is essential when working from the source of hope and dream. We change the world by simply breathing, and we can breathe with no attention or intention. Imagine breathing with full awareness of the change we breathe into the world with every breath in and every breath out. Imagine breathing into this world change that is infused with intention and action.

We breathe out. Others breathe in.
We breathe in. Others breathe out.
We are connected. We always have been.
We have goals; we have objectives. This desire for all to not suffer, to not feel pain, to flourish and to flower instead, cannot be some lollipop ideal we lick to feel better about ourselves and what we’ve been doing with this life. What have we ever really done to reach anything or anyone in a sustained and purpose-filled way? We must move our actions beyond the surface-altruistic, beyond the easy, the comfortable and the secure. It is easy to help a child in need, not so easy to help a hardened criminal.

We must challenge the idea that some are worthy and that others simply are not. We all breathe in and breathe out the same air. The most effective initial effort to help a hungry child is to feed the child. A more substantial and lasting effort than providing a simple meal could be an education and training in how best to grow food where the child lives. If the child is growing food in a dangerous area where criminals can steal the food from the fields and the tables, perhaps this is not the best approach. This happens every day.

These may not be the most effective efforts to expand the life of a criminal, either. Maybe, this criminal needs as much awareness expansion as we do. Let us start there, common ground. The potential for transformation in our communities lay with working with the hardened views we hold and in the hardened views of others.

Challenge yourself at least as much as you challenge others.

Criminals feel disconnected from the results of the actions they take. These people often feel no connection to others; they have been disconnected from the source of hope and dream for a long time. It is this extended period of disconnection by a growing number of people that must be met with compassion, patience and understanding. If we become frustrated so easily with others, especially those who we don’t even know, our own disconnectedness is being exposed. This is a blessing.

Generate as much compassion, patience and understanding for ourselves as we do for others.

These have been missing for so many for too long. We must be the first to give these to begin our own healing. We have an infinite capacity of compassion, patience and understanding within each of us. We need only to attempt to generate these to discover the source within us. Learning to sustain these for extended periods of time can help heal our life, our community and the world.

And, there is much healing that must take place. We must transform how we think and feel about others, all others. Feeding children is vital for their survivor. Healing the hardened is vital for our civilization’s survival.

We start with the child and the hardened heart of our self. We then expand until it encompasses all others.

Our life is an array. It’s a set of principles, environments, capacities and needs that constantly evolves and interacts with the arrays of others. Our principles shift, environments alter, capacities adapt, needs shift. The orientation and stability of our life array determines how best we can transform the world array that we inhabit. The orientation of our life array is perception-guided. The stability is garnered from our expanded awareness of our role here. It is up to us how we perceive this life and our role in this world.

Charting transformation cannot be done with words or with actions alone. Transformation is beyond thoughts or feelings. Transformation begins with our own awareness. That awareness naturally will spread to the greater whole, to the greater array.

Our lives can manifest in infinite ways. We can actually affect the whole, and we’ve been affecting the whole always with minimal to negligent awareness. We can also affect the whole with expert precision or destructive obliviousness. We must be open to seeing life as it truly is.

Transformation happens through awareness alone.
I have never seen life as it truly is. I can see life as it truly is.
I have never seen people as they truly are. I can see people as they truly are.

Finding Strength Within Emotional Intensity, Part One

The exploration of our mind is a vibrant journey.
There are many paths that we discover on that journey.
Emotions play a critical role on the journey within.

Emotions really are another sense. Mostly, emotions ebb and flow so easily, so quickly that if we’re not aware we lose a lot of rich data about how we live our lives.

The intensity of some emotional experiences can be uplifting or utterly debilitating. Learning how to chart the intensity zones within garners true strength toward living, propelling and motivating us forward.

• Explore and Embrace the Source of Emotions

In order to discover the strength within the intensity of our emotional experiences, we must begin to embrace the reality that these emotions cannot be injected into us by others or by circumstances. Just as the nerves from finger to brain exist regardless if we’re touching something or someone, the emotional system is there regardless if we’re feeling anything or not.

This is not something to just accept and embrace. Explore the beginnings and endings of emotions within yourself. We must have a firm grasp on this truth, otherwise we’ll constantly become distracted or weighed down by the sheer volume of emotional data we receive daily.

Mistakenness begins with assumption and survives with attachment. Challenge this idea that emotions somehow originate from others, others who somehow inject these emotions into us. If emotions came from others, we’ll always play slave to others.

When intense emotions do fire in our emotional system, it is difficult for the mind, initially, to treat these as simply sensory data. Just as many chefs over an extended period of time and experience in the kitchen become less reactive to burns and cuts, so can we become less reactive to our emotional intensity.

Embracing this rich source of data is something that will take a great deal of compassion, patience and understanding. It is only through opening awareness to these emotions that we learn what each is attempting to tell us about our life and our connection to the universe. This is the process of re-forging that connection.

The Mind as a Knife to Cloud

Our senses and our perceptions are inaccurate and imperfect. Both of these dynamic aspects of living have an amazing impact on how we approach our daily life.

Our mind is the life blood and nervous system to these senses and perceptions. Considering we are the operators of our body, it is entirely up to us how we wield our senses and shape our perceptions. Our senses select the clay; our mind selects the tools and methods to form that clay. We then can manifest a new reality.

It is entirely possible to be in a rolling meadow of flowers and butterflies and be upset about allergies and insects. It is also possible to be in this same meadow and not think of anything about anything there or anywhere. We could even be contemplating astrophysics while having a picnic on the meadow. Truly, all options are available and connected through this life through only our mind. It is up to us.

Mostly, people take little to no ownership over the mental processes that govern living. It is astoundingly easy to cede ownership and control over our life to others, to events and to conditions. On the surface our life seems all about these aspects as everything is connected. It is far easier to see and touch life outside of our bodies then consider the life inside our mind. We can think life is out there, however, life is lived through our mind alone. Ultimately, it is up to us what we see and how we see it.

Others, events and conditions can overwhelm our senses and twist our perceptions but only if we allow ourselves to become confused, disoriented and unaware. Challenging our minds to embrace this ownership of on-the-spot living is easy to do but difficult to sustain. Anyone can focus the mind with intention for a moment. Sustaining that focus through foggy mornings and stormy nights is difficult, but it is possible. It is up to us.

Anyone can take the wheel; few realize the most effective and efficient ways of navigation with that wheel, as there is no one way to do anything. Becoming the ultimate observer over the effects of our actions and intentions is the only process that has the potential to reach the ideal of effective, efficient living.

The mind is powerful. It governs this body, it focuses the senses and it acts on this life. In the midst of a storm, the mind can cut through the distractive aspects of that storm and we can navigate through it.

This is not about ignoring the storm; that could have deadly consequences. This is about engaging with the storm, learning about it, as we've engaged and learned about our self.

We’re learning how to navigate this ship called life through the turbulence of now. The turbulence is only an illusion. We can see through that illusion if we see it as such. It is up to us.

The Responsibility in Not

“I may have lost a month, but I do not have to lose another.”
Taking responsibility can be helpful, destructive or meaningless. Intentions and actions are critical fuels for taking responsibility. Often, we consider only actions with regard to our responsibilities in life. The role of inaction in our lives and the lives of others in our community takes a far greater toll and is a far heavier weight than most realize.

It is through inaction that abusive situations are allowed to fester and infect the community. It is through inaction that beneficial energies are never collected and spread to those in need. It is through inaction that distances us from doing anything with this extraordinary opportunity called life and living.

Truly, the worthiness of life is dictated by what we do not choose to do. Our capacity and worth are limitless qualities. The only limits we place on that capacity are self-constructed. By not doing anything, we save ourselves from culpability by others. This does not save us from the responsibility from doing nothing; it only saves us from risking what we have, risking the comfortable conditions we may feel we must have and risking being mistaken or seen as not perfect.

Any bit of comfort and security we enjoy are illusory. None of it is substantial or lasting. Resting in this state creates a logjam in the river of potential and possibility. The comfort and security we so wish to hold onto with all that we do and don’t do makes freedom and joy less likely to develop, and not only just for ourselves but for others as well.

Risk and responsibility are connected.

It is a risk to explore what stymies me.
It is a risk to do so with open heart and open mind.
It is a risk to let go of not doing anything.
It is my responsibility to see this through.

The Internal Water Cycle

Life is simple. Consciousness is an intricate overlay on that simple life.

This is a personal account I make here today. An attempt to not impale hope on the spire of personal degradation.

Much progress can be made in our daily lives. Any progress made is more often than not lost. Sustaining progress is where real transformation takes on a new life.

Meanwhile, we're lost in this internal water cycle. Progress is made, usually involving some wind and tears. This waters our grounds, allowing life to grow in many ways, some flowers, some weeds, all seeds that we plant continuously.

So, the sun comes out, and shines on what we're growing in our life. Sometimes what we then see isn't quite what we expected.

We didn't even realize we've been planting seeds throughout every day, and there's a hole in our pocket where we kept all of the seeds. This is why our life is a hit and miss mess. We must get out of this endless cycle. The only answer seems ever increasing levels of awareness.

Today,
We're not even aware our living has seeded our life.
We're not even aware of what grows from that living.
We're not even aware of how to change both.

Today,
We're making awareness a priority.
We're making awareness pivotal.
We're making awareness in everything that we do.

Out of the Padded Room: From Intention to Action

“Life can become rigid. It can also become pliable.”

If we consider for only a minute at the end of our day what we wish to accomplish when next we wake, we can begin to open our life in an entirely new set of directions. This “new set” has always been possible and despite what we do or don’t do, it is always within reach. We embark on this “new set” on our own terms.

This new ownership and direction is an eye-opener for many as we may have been filling our day with numerous actions and activities with no intention or direction, maybe even nourishment without any conceivable benefit.

What is the intention behind all of our actions today? What is it that we’re really after?

Are we checking someone else’s boxes for our life, or do we directly determine what boxes we wish to set out to check this day?

These are all critical questions that mostly are left to linger in the backs of our minds. Rarely do we even listen to these concerns. Even rarer do we bother to search our actions for any relevance in our daily living. We’ve locked away our living potential in a padded room.

Some of our activities are about nourishing ourselves or others, but if we do not set out the energy of intention that fuels all those activities, we’re placing all of that nourishment in a padded room. It’s as if we’ve been watering a plant in a room with no light; it’s not going to grow much, if at all. Also, we are unable to tell when we’ve added too much water. We may just be drowning what we wish to grow.

One can do much when locked away in a life of comfort and security without ever leaving that padded room. Oblivious to the events going on outside of our padded existence is like remaining in a burning building and wondering why it is that we’re suffocating without ever venturing out of supposed comfort to discover the answers.

How do we get out of this situation?

Unlocking that door requires looking for the key. The key is here with us right now, hidden in our padded room. Intention is like a light source, allowing us to find the key we threw into the darkness of futility. Do we turn it on?

We must tread carefully here. Lack of fulfillment of our intentions can be quite the weapon at keeping us down. Perhaps, our intentions are a bit diffuse or a bit too concrete. We must explore these intentions thoroughly.

What about what we want to do is unrealistic or even unhealthy? What about what we can do right here and now is not fulfilling? What are we doing? Why are we doing it?

Challenge your intentions thoroughly, but do not allow the challenge to diminish your capacity. We’re looking for what is possible now, not some outlandish ethereal dream. Perhaps, we will find a path to that Olympian existence in the clouds at the height of the mountain, but we must triumph over today in order to begin that journey to greatness. We need hiking gear and elements of sustenance.

Simple exposure of our intentions is the first step. Then, we set out on the actions and activities to fulfill those intentions. Some people have the best of intentions but rarely examine how best to actualize these in any real way. If we don’t construct a path to reach what we want in our life, we wait for someone else or some “higher power” to deliver them to us, becoming upset at those other people and other powers when nothing changes.

What works and what doesn’t can change from day to day, season to season, place to place. If we expect a walk in the park to provide relief always, we’re ignoring the reality of stormy days, dark and lonely nights and a bitter, cold winter blizzard. We must not become stubborn in our movement forward.

The ritual of coffee brewing can be highly charging for the day. However, some days there simply are no beans to grind. Can we really reason it out that without coffee we cannot function? This is another pitfall: getting stuck by the comfort of the padding of our room.

Becoming open to this present moment is a simple concept, but it is much more difficult to apply adequately and thoroughly. Deciphering if yesterday’s nourishment is today’s numbing agent is extremely difficult, as what wakes us up can also put us to bed. Determining the difference is critical in moving forward. The difference is our mental effort involved in what we’re doing. That effort is our intention behind everything that we do and don’t do.

Step by step, day by day we’ll begin to see what has little relevance to meeting our objectives. As we begin this ongoing dialogue with our day, we’ll find new ways of living. It is a natural outgrowth from connecting intentions with actions. The lines of cause and effect are difficult to decipher, yet imagine if we can find just one of those lines. Once we see how cause and effect interact with our life we can begin to affect both.

Can we remain in the padded room that has become our life? It might not feel like the cushy existence because we yearn not only for more but to do more. The padded room is painful for that reason alone.

We know there’s much to do. The building is on fire. Will we just stand by in our own darkness, suffocating on our ineffectiveness and disconnectedness? Or, are we going to discover our way out of the confines of our padded room living?

Can we not apply a minimum of effort? Can we not take that one minute at the end of the day to imagine what we want to accomplish when next we wake?

An Etch-a-Sketch Life

We are composed of similar bits of matter and energy. Each gathering of matter and energy is dependent upon the whole of matter and energy for its existence. In fact, there’s a steady stream of matter and energy into and out of each of us. These streams tether us to the rest of the universe whether we’re aware of this fact or not.

Stop water flowing into our bodies, and we can die.

Yet, our deaths are not the end of what makes up this life. What happens at death is simply the further dispersal of the matter and energy that has been driving this entity called life. At death, this matter and energy begins to scatter back into the broader universal stream. Despite appearing eternally in flux, the whole has not changed.

The universe, just like life, is as an Etch-a-Sketch. We can draw all over the screen. We can make one shape; we can make many shapes. We can cover up old shapes with new shapes; we can also incorporate the old shapes into new ones. At any point in time, we can shake the Etch-a-Sketch and all of it seemingly disappears. Despite this disappearance, all that was ever on the screen remains within the Etch-a-Sketch itself.

Appearances are equally deceiving. Opening our minds to the exploration of this reality called life is a process. An infinite capacity for creation and destruction exists in each of us. Despite all that we can build and all that we can dismantle, in the next breath we can begin anew.

Challenging all of the assumptions of appearance without dismantling our life and our connections is difficult. However, the pursuit can yield tangible results.

At any stage in our journey, we need only shake up our assumptions and begin anew. Regardless of starting fresh or continuing to work with the shapes of today, it is only the appearance that has changed. The capacity for both remains.

The Awareness in Vulnerability

We are vulnerable beings. We live; we suffer; we die. Despite these truths, it is possible to create an illusion of invulnerability, both mentally and emotionally. The creation of these illusions is the source of much of our confusion and sustains the suffering throughout our life toward our eventual death. This confusion creates a barrier to the awareness that is consistently available in every moment.

Our vulnerability is a vibrant, infinite reservoir of awareness. It provides immediate feedback. To not utilize such a rich source of data about our life and how we live it is a critical lapse in awareness. We must explore the origins of our awareness lapse; otherwise, our confusion will continue to infect everything we do.

Ownership and awareness of our vulnerability is not the cliché “succumbing to our fears.” In fact, it is through acceptance of our fears that we take the first step toward working through those fears.

Fears can be real warnings of danger. Sometimes, fears can be conjured up visions to hold us back from making real change, not only in our own life but in the lives of others. It is far easier to sit and suffer than get up and do something about it, especially when uncertain of what to do. That uncertainty originates in our unwillingness to experience our vulnerability.

We may be in a terrible situation, but it’s a situation we know well, and not all of it is so terrible. There’s at least a bit of stability within the terrible, otherwise we would not be able to survive it. Our fears and our vulnerability make leaving behind that bit of stability almost intolerable.

This is why, despite all the evidence, people stay in abusive situations. For some, the abusive situation holds the only source of stability they can ever be open to living right now. To face the vulnerability this situation presents in their life is terrifying. The intensity of that terrifying truth is too much. Instead of facing it, it’s completely blocked. It’s blocked by an unwillingness to embrace vulnerability, feel our fear and then do something about both.

Using words and phrases like vulnerability and working through fear are lovely ideas. How can we translate these words and phrases into real changes right here, right now?

This is a process, much like a natural spring we find in the desert. We need to drink from the spring often. Too often, we can become choked or engorged with water. Not enough, we become parched quickly. Patience is crucial.

Someone just turned out the lights. If we have patience, our eyes will grow accustomed to less light and we will see again. The same is true with our vulnerability. At first it can be blinding or deafening. If we sit in that vulnerability for a bit, we will be able to see and hear again.

Truly, we can each go to this natural spring within us in any moment. Maybe, it’s become barely a trickle. If we open up, it will flow free again.

We’ve been living life in an entirely different way for the majority of our life. We can always go back to that state of normalcy, and we probably all will when we walk away from this moment. What’s the real risk in attempting something different for just a bit? That’s where you start.

The Fruits of Our Mind

When uncertain of what to do, let loose your mind on this very moment.
The potential in every moment is determined by our minds alone.

The mind is a powerful force. It is as a wild animal. Our mind uses our senses as tentacles, retrieving data on the environment. What data we retrieve is a combination of the intentional focusing of our senses on an object and our senses naturally collecting information autonomously. Data collection is either wild or tamed by our intention. Either way, our minds are constantly engaging the world.

The mind is not just a data retrieval vessel. It takes this data and sorts it, truncates it, attaches it to all the other data that has already been sorted, truncated and attached. It is this mental activity that we can alter.

Begin the exploration of the mind.
Close your eyes. Become open to simply watching the mind do what it does.
Don't force or control it, just watch your mind's efforts.
These efforts are the potential fruits of your life.
We can guide our mind and decide which fruits ripen to perfection and which fruits wither on the vine, nourishing the whole.

In-between the Bookends

The day is filled with thoughts and feelings. These tumble one after another, sometimes forming synergistic experiences. We attempt to label these special experiences with words, like ecstasy, trauma, bliss, synergistic, special. None of these words could ever accurately describe the actual experience. It is something one must directly experience and witness for oneself.

There are actual activities and atmospheres that can yield paths to these direct experiences. The paths all lead to the same place, a deep mental and emotional connection to the present moment. This means the capacity is omnipresent; it is right here, right now, always.

What is it that blocks us from these extra ordinary, direct experiences of thought and feeling? It is our ignorance, our mistakenness. Both direct experience AND mistakenness are concurrently existent. Through awareness of our mistakenness we open the door to direct experience.

Awareness is not judgmental. Awareness is openness. It is not about right. It is not about wrong. Simply, awareness just is. It is in every thing and every one and is within this very moment.

The allure of these synergistic experiences can also close down that awareness. Too easily, we become attached to the greatness in ecstasy and bliss. This attachment denies us continued awareness and simultaneously closes the door on openness.

We also block less “feeling good” emotions and thoughts with aversive measures. Aversion is our mental reaction to not having it our way.
Between the two bookends of attachment and aversion, the vacuum of our self takes hold.

Our mind was designed for awareness, not for vacancy. It is this vacuum of self, the space between attachment and aversion, which is the barrier for direct experience. We’ve created a logjam within the universe, attempting to hold onto what we want and pushing off what we do not. In these synergistic moments, the logjam has been dislodged, if only for just a moment.

Imagine removing this logjam intentionally. Only we can remove the barrier of the idea of our self. Through exploration and awareness of this vacuum we can begin its purposeful removal.

Changing the Observer into the Observed

The mind lives through the brain and the body through the sensory apparatus and consciousness. The mind is not just a physical object that can be cut out and dissected. It spans outside of the physical body through the sensory organs and the consciousness using the body to manipulate, re-orient and alter the surrounding physical world.

Mostly, we apply minimal effort to the examination of how our mind and body interact with each other and our world. Our curiosity of the inner universe should be nurtured, as it is this inner universe that directly engages with our connection to the whole that is the universe. If we open ourselves to the real connection that exists between us and everything else, we embark on a journey that seeks to cut through the illusion-centered existence that clouds our judgment and muddles our involvement.

Ignoring the realm most accessible to us anywhere and anytime and in any conditions is an option for us all. Despite ignorance of this internal realm, it is always there. Our mind was developed to explore. If we do not take ownership over the mind’s exploration, this is where the subconscious is allowed to reign. We can rejoin with our subconscious by exploring it. The way to explore it is to turn the mind on itself and observe the ultimate observer.

The option is always there. We can continue to choose to take this option lightly. Imagine what would be possible if we take that option seriously. We could begin unraveling the causes and the effects in our lives. We don’t even need to devote the entire day to this exploration. We could just try this for a moment, even less than a minute. Our day deserves at least that much.

The Masks of Appearance

Appearances can dominate the mind and cloud our judgment because the mind is where appearance is born, takes residence and seizes control.

The mind gathers information about our environment through the senses using the sensory organs to do so. The sheer mountain of sensory input that is continuously being generated makes it difficult to end the dominance of both the sensory information and our categorization of that input in our daily life. It is the combination of the volume and the sorting of volume where appearance takes hold. It is far easier to assume with casual gathering observations than to uncover the truth behind the surface of those initial observations.

We can see a car, even drive a car, without any clue as to how the car is able to be and do. We can see a car that is a stationary and not realize if it was either simply idle but drivable or if it was broken down and needing to be carted off with a tow. Mostly, we don’t try to find the keys to someone else’s car to discover which is true. This is the same with most of our assumptions based on appearances. We elect to not take off the mask and explore what lay underneath.

We don’t challenge appearances easily. In fact, if we challenge every appearance, we would not be able to do much on this earth and in this society that could affect change on much of anything.

The amazing aspect of the mind is its discernment function. With exploration of the mind, we can begin to unravel how the mind works and why it works in the way it does. We can learn which mental expeditions are the most efficient and effective at retrieving the most rich, diverse data for the most useful and expansive mental functions.

Once we set off on one of these mental expeditions, we directly impact and affect what we are exploring. We change the circumstances. Sometimes, these changes can yield amazingly rich data on what lay underneath the appearance. Sometimes, it yields misleading or fallacious data due to our interference. If we were to walk away, it may return back to the previous state, or we may have started a process of continued adaptation without any further intervention.

Appearances are at the heart of our daily lives. Appearances drive our decisions. Taking off the masks of appearance can assist us in both.

The Hurt Struggle

“You hurt me.”
If we feel others have hurt us, this is mostly not true. We most often hurt ourselves.

Harm comes to us in three major ways: physical, mental and emotional. Emotional and mental harm, however, are self-created. We only use others in order to do the harm to ourselves without claim of ownership. What we think and what we feel are our own thoughts and feelings. Although we all have the capacity for similar thoughts and similar feelings, these are internal, individual experiences.

This discussion is challenging; let us ease into it.

Certainly, we can physically harm others. We, however, have a fairly superior role in where we are and who is around us. There are some very notable exceptions, sometimes involving work and home. Work and home environments, however, are mostly dictated by our own judgments at certain points.

Other major exceptions do exist in our modern world, involving totalitarian rule and grand scale oppression. Recently, weaknesses have been exposed even in these ways of governance and control. Despite these exceptions, unless we’re being held against our will, we hold the superior role. This does not make the role an easy one; it just means that it is ours to wield.

As long as we continue to see life as being done to us, we’re going to languish in suffering. If we realize we’re at work for a reason, that we live where we do for a reason, then the life dynamic changes from one of victim to overseer. This moment immediately becomes more workable.

We will get through this moment to the next regardless of effort or lack thereof. It is the way in which we consider this moment and our role in it that is the only difference.

We can become distracted by the struggle against reality. It is our struggle against what is that does not much to alter the current state of affairs. A fiery, feisty spirit can be a huge benefit in difficult times, but it can also get in the way. Learning the difference between fighting and accepting is not a clear difference.

Lack of struggle cannot be simple acquiescence. We’re not going to just take it. We’re going to do something about it. To be able to do something about it, we must be able to take it in completely and fully. That is why we have our senses connected to our mind. These senses are a set of devices designed to assist us in working through this moment, directly altering matter and energy to manifest a seemingly different next moment.

None of this is easy. Understanding our role in our life is just a step toward a new life status, one where life and living is on our terms, not the terms of others. Does this mean we don’t contract with people and entities in order to gain a firm footing? No. But, when we do, we need to realize the need, accept the help and live within that contract. Considering other more autonomous options is part of this ongoing process.

We must be careful here. Just because life and living come back under our umbrellas of authority and responsibility, does not stop the tumultuous nature of life weathering that is ongoing. What it does give us is an opportunity to learn as we go, witnessing the results of our direct interventions as we do. This is how we learn as we actively live.

If we’re looking for a simple answer to permanently cure our pain, we won’t find it. The answers have been covered up by misconstruing the source of pain and the source of salvation as something outside of us. Neither is true. Through the exploration of our roles in our lives, we at least give ourselves an opportunity of uncovering these sources from the universe within. It is, after all, the universe within that connects us directly to the universe as a whole.

An Enemy of Hostility: Understanding

To understand hostility is to understand insanity.
Hostility is a commonality in our society. It is delivered in both direct and subtle ways. Direct hostility is more easily dealt with in group settings, less so when dealing one-on-one. Subtle hostility is both difficult to detect and to counteract.

Both direct and subtle hostility can be dangerous and deadly when ignored. Beginning an exploration about each can yield benefits in a hostile workplace as well as a hostile world. Not embarking on that exploration prior to hostile acts may prove more dangerous and deadly than the hostility itself.

“To understand hostility is to understand insanity.” This is where to start in approach, attempt understanding, always. If we’ve been attempting understanding in other less dire situations, it will be there for us in our last moment or give us one last opportunity to change the course of a situation.

Hostility one-on-one can be the cliché life and death situation. Sometimes, there are no actions that can be taken to survive a direct attack, surprise or foreseen. If there is a little room for action, the action we take must be skilled, targeted and delivered with the force of our life.

Last year when I was assaulted and my life was attempted to be taken from this Earth, it was on-the-spot generation of understanding that saved my body from further harm and death.

As I knew my attacker, I didn’t see the attack coming, at all. There was no running from this, as I was truly completely alone and truly completely vulnerable. It was the shock of not having any awareness that I reacted to, not the physical attack by the person. Somehow, generating understanding was the proper response in that specific situation.

“Why are you doing this to me?” was what came out of my bloodied mouth. My on-the-spot attempt to understand my attacker saved my life. The would-be killer had this look of abject horror cross his face, and then he took off, leaving me behind to pick up the pieces.

I’ve been on a constant pursuit of understanding others. It comes naturally for me now. Understanding has become my default response to adversity, to feeling alien amidst the masses.

Understanding is a bridge between us. Even the most harsh of circumstances can be directly affected by its on-the-spot generation. Does this always yield success? No. But it does open up the door on possibility. That is the definition of understanding, being open to possibility.

To remain living despite my momentary lack of awareness is humbling. One moment of lacking awareness nearly ended my life. One moment of understanding brought it back from the brink caused by my break in my awareness.

Any missteps any of us ever take are understandable. If we remain vigilant in the midst of these missteps, we may be able to take a different step.

We must continually open the door of understanding.
We must consistently walk through it.

Effort, From Rubble to Rubble

Effort is a curious enterprise. It involves the combining of body and mind with external and internal resources to achieve something beyond the individual components alone. Effort is at the core of what it is to be human. We have the mind to use our body to manifest immediate and long-term changes in our lives and in our environments.

All effort and all outcomes, however, cannot be kept or stored in any way. To attempt to hold onto any effort or any outcome is a common misstep. This desire to hold on is a supreme source of pain and suffering in our lives. As long as this desire to hold on remains, we create pain and we create suffering. We sabotage all that we do, and we limit what is possible.

Effort can produce a pile of rubble to a spiking skyscraper. The timing and methods used in its construction are critical in reaching the highest of outcomes. A skyscraper will become a pile of rubble and can do so by many means. Actually, the skyscraper is already made up of a pile of rubble, it just isn’t obvious. Poor construction, malicious acts and unwitting accidents can quicken the pace toward this rubblehood. Natural means will eventually do away with all these things, including all skyscrapers.

Due to the rubble nature of all things, from obvious rubble to skyscraper-looking rubble, we must learn to let go of our effort and unleash it upon our day. Give this effort freely as effort is infinitely replenishable.

In observing others as well as myself, I’ve discovered the grasping nature of effort in modern day society. Effort has become very self-fulfilling, and the results of that effort seem to be absolutely unfulfilling for everyone. The excruciating results of self-fulfilling efforts can be witnessed everywhere, simply observe others with understanding and compassion.

If we are attached to the results of our effort, and, only act when we can hold onto those results, every action and every thought of action weighs us down considerably. Our mental activity becomes one of determining who and what is worthy of our effort. Attempting to determine winners and losers in all that we do limits not only our capacity to act but the quality of the results.

These mental gymnastics wear down the mind and the body. Any action we do take becomes unfocused; every observation we do make becomes distracted. Another option does exist. We can exert effort freely with no thought of keeping that effort to our self. In the very next moment, we can make effort again. Our body and our mind can continuously regenerate effort and action.

Yes, the body’s capacity changes, but so can our effort. Broken bones and disabilities do not end our ability to apply effort. In fact, these challenges help to focus that effort with expert precision. Certainly, we can see disabilities as limitations or as our tore down body-mind skyscraper, but we can see them as something quite different. We can see them as opportunities to discover other internal resources and capacities to build something altogether better, and not for our own self-interest, but for the interests of others.

Irritabilities, Origins Within

Irritability. Where does it come from? When it strikes, it seems everything is prickly, everything is hurtful, everything is tainted by pain and infused with suffering.

We certainly find ourselves irritable often. In those moments, clarity of thought vanishes, actions become muddled and our intentions become toxic with expectation.

Perhaps, the supposed symptoms of irritability are actually the cause of it. If that is so, where and what is our first step down this well-worn path?

Expectation has many subtle avenues into thoughts, feelings and actions. Without expectations, where is the fuel for irritation? Without expectations, where are the barriers between us and others?

We create these ideas of others and ideas of outcomes and expect someone to step into the outcome we’ve envisioned.

Learning to disengage expectations is an enduring pursuit. It is a pursuit worthy of consistent, sincere effort. It is a pursuit we must embark upon today, every day. In the midst of irritation, it is vital.

Fear and Loneliness, In a Crowded Space

We’ve experienced this, congregating with good intent, for right purpose.

We feel good, we feel sufficiently congregrated.

Yet, there’s this guttural undertone. We feel alien. We feel alone. We feel scared. We’re in a crowded space.

Reaching out is nearly automatic. Reaching out invokes response.

Initially, we reach out to those physically nearest us. We feel a connection to this moment we describe and experience. Yet, the response hits the rocks that comprise our self.

Questions, concerns, fears take over.

What are these people after? Is this some personal joke, where we’re the punch line?

Are they just working out some past personal travesty on us? Simply, checking some box to feel better about who and what they are? Which and why they have done what they have done?

Not dissuaded by the falling so short of initial response, we begin expanding our reaching out beyond the immediate physical space that feels so crowded. This seems much like writhing in a desert and imagining water. Can any good come from it?

What possible relief is so not here that we must conjure it up with our mind? And, this conjured vision of relief is elsewhere, not here. Are our hopes that distant from the reality we appear to occupy?

Maybe, our hopes and our reality are neither.

It appears obvious; our immediate attempts at immediate relief will not be answered. Our secondary attempts at relief will not be answered. Not because the answers are not there, but because of where we seek those answers, from others.

As long as we look for salvation and relief from outside of us, we will absolutely fail at both. The way we feel is internal junk and not fired up by some external source. Any change of how we feel must originate internally, not from some external salvation. Any change of how we think begins with our mind and ends with what we do with it.

We fear what we feel we cannot affect in this life. We feel alone when we feel we cannot affect others in any productive way, one-on-one or in some crowded space.

Both the fear and the loneliness are apparitions. Both are an illusion we create to not act and to feel frozen in inaction.

Our intention, good, has been allowed to become clouded by the ideas of tomorrow and the failures of yesterday.

Both the hopes and the fears live in this day. Neither are standalone.

Both hope and fear drag life into the emotional gutter, the mind locking the door on the way down.

Neither hope nor fear can provide any relief for any one.

Hopes and fears are synonymous. Let go of both now. Live now.

Death Happens, Understanding Happens

Death happens. It’s what makes life possible.

Our lives are much different than we can ever understand with thought or feeling alone. Still, just a consideration of death and life can yield concepts approaching understanding of everything, approaching enlightenment.

Our mind is what sets us apart from the rest of the universe. This apartness is at the heart of much of our pain and all of our suffering because it is not true. In reality, everything that is the universe is still here, no less, no more. It’s the same everything, it just seems completely different.

In every bit of us are the beginnings of the universe. In every bit of us are bits of mom, bits of dad, bits of humanity.

The same is true of everyone you meet and in everything you can see or feel. We are inextricably connected to everything and everyone.

When we are born, the universe did not change or shift at all. The same is true when we die, the universe does not alter or change course whatsoever. The universe just is. And, we are part of that is, alive or dead.

Every bit of the past no longer exists. The past is all the present is. The present contains all that will be all futures. Those futures will all ultimately be called a present.

Search for deeper understanding. It is there.
Challenge the assumptions at the heart of your every day.
Everything that ever was is in this day. Everything that will ever be is in this day.

We can unleash the potential of right now.
We have a mind. We have a heart. We have a body. What do you want to do with it?